Making Progress and Attending Bakossi Weddings in Douala!

To kick things off this week I would like to play a song by Don Tom - a very popular Nigerian artist. There is such great music to dance to here! It is not all Cameroonian though, the majority of the popular music comes from Nigeria. This song is super popular here and played all the time :)

 

 Here is another popular song, the video is not very great but the song is :)

I have been busy busy busy and need to make more time to write in my journal and on my blog.

Yoga on the rooftop
I have began teaching yoga classes Monday-Wednesday-Friday at 6:30am on the rooftop of a friends apartment building in Molyko, Buea. I have anywhere from 4-8 students a day. They are really enjoying it and I am having fun too. We started doing classes in the bottom of an apartment building next to my colleague Delegate's (his real name is Max but everyone calls him Delegate pronounced 'Deli-gay') house. It was almost like an open garage and the doors to two peoples' rooms were located just there - so if they stepped outside to go to work or for whatever reason...they were in our yoga class. It was also distracting because on water day (Buea has water every other day) everyone would be filling up their buckets and jugs from the tap that was literally right behind the class. So people would just be staring at us and even sometimes saying things - all in good fun, but it was hard for me to teach and to keep my students focused so we found a better place - right on top of the very same building is a beautiful open rooftop that overlooks Buea and Mt. Cameroon. That is where I teach now, people can't distract us but the noise from the busy street is still there. I will have photos soon :)

Networking and Civil Society Strengthening
Last week I was invited to attend the Press Conference for the launch of the project “Action for Civil Society Organizations (CSO) Strengthening in the South West Region- ACSOS”. It was implemented by Reach Out Cameroon (and NGO in Buea) within the framework of the Civil Society Strengthening Programme- PASC. PASC is a Cameroon and European Union partnership. It was interesting to see where CSO like Social Development International are going in the next year to come and what the Southwest Regions plan is to strengthen their capacity. It was a good networking event and I made a couple of contacts. They plan to made a database of NGOs/CSOs in the region by their themes (what they focus on: eg: health, micro-finance, water/sanitation, youth empowerment, etc) and their location so that organization can work together to meet common goals and objectives. That was a problem I noticed from the start. There are hundreds (literally) of NGOs just in Buea and they are all so small and trying to do all the same things....if they just worked together it would be much more beneficial to the community, the region and the country.

Moving Foward
Things are really starting to come together with the organization I am working for, Social Development International. I said I wanted to start at the grassroots level in this "international development" field...and boy I sure am. I had a meeting with the organization founder (Suliman) discussing transparency, accountability, record keeping, volunteer recruitment and project sustainability/success. The money and finance part sort of went in circles and got no where, but I think he understood my concerns about the way volunteers are recruited and the way programs are run. As a man said during the ACSOS program earlier in the week "If you try to do everything, you will not be able to do anything well" and since Suliman was at that Press Conference, I refered to that quote several times as I was explaining how we shouldn't be running 10-12 different programs with SDI ...we need to focus on a few and see them to completion.
Because of this discussion and what I have seen so far with the way the organization is run... I am in the process of leading volunteer/intern recruitment and orientation section of SDI. I will be creating job descriptions for the interns and start looking for people to fill the position. I am creating intern policies that will list all of their job duties and what is required out of them when they are working. Since there is literally NO record of what people do here, that is one of the first things that needs to change.

Tribal Wrestling in Bakwai village
I was invited by some friends to go see Tribal Wrestling in Bakwai village which is the 'brother village' of Bonduma village (where the SDI office is located). I was so impressed by the quickness and strength of everyone who fought!! We arrived early and sat in chairs behind the elders of the village underneath a makeshift bamboo shelter. I saw the chief and introduced myself, thanking him for allowing me to bear witness to such an event. This event takes place every Sunday for 4 weekends and then it moves to another village. Participants started to arrive by foot singing, chanting and dancing as they neared the wrestling field. Directly across from where I was sitting there was another bamboo structure that held drummers 10feet or so above the ground. They played the entire time :) Soon about 3 villages and their wrestlers had showed up, each taking different corners or sides of the field.

You can tell who the winner is in this one...

Men/boys and women/girls of all ages are allowed to wrestle but it was dominated by males. I saw women whom my friend said were going to wrestle, but time did not permit so I was not able to see them. Things worked like this: if you saw someone you wanted to wrestle, you approached them and bowed, if they accept, they return the bow and you both walk to the scored table (which was right in front of where we sat) to sign up together. If you were looking for someone to wrestle one people had started you walked around doing various things that symbolized you were looking for someone to fight. Some walked around with long large grass leaves in their hand shaking them and singing, others wrapped themselves in a Cameroonian flag and just walked with their arms spread open like wings. The matches started with the youngest age group, maybe about 5-7years old and they continued up to full grown adults. You could see the skill level and pure strength increase with every change of age group. I was impressed by even the youngsters... they do not joke around - they take this wrestling very seriously.

Drumming away with an attentive crowd.

When the match would begin, they would be escorted out by their village coach who always seemed to be giving them some sort of inspirational pep talk. The ref would check the two opponents for 'illegal' things such as sharp objects, shoes, etc. He would have them shake hands and then the fun would begin. It wasn't the wrestling I was exposed to in the US... if you are whatsoever flipped on your behind/back area - you lose. There is no 'pinning' for 3 seconds or anything like that....it is all about staying low to the ground and keeping your balance. As the age category increased so did the competitiveness and seriousness. If there was a very good match, were it was going into the 3rd round (the final round where if no one was flipped on their back it would be called a tie), the crowd would start going wild. Whenever a person would win a match like that... it was like making a winning shot at the buzzer during a state championship basketball game - everyone from the crowd would just pour out onto the field screaming and cheering and then soon go back to their respected sides for the next match to begin.
I am seriously considering training for a few days and wrestling one of these weekend - I just dont know if I can find the time between travel and work. It looked like so much fun!! I hope you enjoy this video I made of just some of the matches I witnessed. I had to pay 1,000 cfc to photograph (2USD) but it was totally worth it, and I don't mind supporting village activities like that...even though I'm sure the money just went to palm wine :)

Muea Teen Mother Empowerment Workshops
After working with a handful of social mobilizers in Muea our second Identification workshop had a phenomenal turn out of 30 girls!! We had the mobilizers make lists of who they talked to, so when we arrived at 4pm we called many of them and sent the mobilizers out for one last round of reminders. We explained the program several times, since people kept coming in late, and made it clear that if they didn't want to be there - we didn't want them to be there either. Everyone seemed interested and on board. We helped them fill out paper work and set the date for the next and first official workshops.
A Delegate from the Ministry of Women's Empowerment opened up the workshop with some motivational words. She was actually really inspirational and got the girls singing, smiling and laughing. We stood and sang a couple of songs before our next speakers. Mr. Bate and the Manager both attended on behalf of Buea Mutual Health Care and they gave an introduction on the importance of good health, the benefits of having Mutual Health and how it worked. We had a total of 15 girls attend, which in my opinion - is excellent. We took photos of the girls and their children (if they had any) and also chose topics for the next few months of workshops.

The photo is quite blurry but here we are at the first official workshop in Muea! :)

After all the difficulties in Maumu and talking to several Cameroonians (and a friends/family at home), I am realizing that the way we were trying to go about this program wasn't the best idea. We are complete outsiders, especially me. These girls and their families wont trust me and our project for months. Instead of trying to target 20 teens from 5 different villages, I think it will be better to stick to 2 villages and work with whoever wants to attend. Soon the community and other girls will see the long term and short term benefits of the program. They will see out faces and become familiar with the project and our presence. I am thinking after some weeks or so, more girls will want to join in which case I will start a new series of workshops for a new group of girls in the same village.

Reaching out to Bolifamba (aka Mile 16) with Social Mobilizers
The Manager of Mutual Health has paired me with two women from Bolifamba whom I met with last week. I will be seeing them tomorrow and be doing a training of social mobilizers in the village. I will sensitize these social mobilizers on the Teen Mother Empowerment program and all of the benefits. From there, they will go door to door (as was done in Muea) to tell the community about the program and answer all questions. The identification will be set for sometime next week at the Bolifamba hospital, they already agreed to let us use their room once a week for our workshops.

Epic Bakossi Wedding
 Last week on Wednesday I went with Delegate to Douala for his nieces wedding which was a 3-4 day event. We had planned this for about a month since he knew I was interested in seeing 'traditional and cultural activities'. Wow!! What an event! Although it was in the Littoral region (which is Francophone) his family is Bakossi which is an Anglophone tribe so all week we spoke English, Pigdin-English, and their Dialect (Bakossi).

The traditional wedding was on Wednesday evening and it consisted of a massive party with tons of music, dancing and a lot of traditional activities. We arrived around 5pm and rested a bit as more and more family started showing up. Everyone was ridiculously welcoming and kind. After some introductions and some activities we ate. There was SO much food I thought I was going to explode.

Main guys are in the two white shirts. One was the elder brother of the
groom who is in the blue on the right.

So. Much. Delicious. Food.

After we had finished eating it was nearing midnight and I was already beginning to feel sleepy - I was just not used to staying up late. There were 2-3 men who were leading all of the festivities. There was a lot of palm wine drinking from a calabash. As the festivities continued I had one of the Aunties as me to help her with part of a traditional ceremony. I was a bit confused and embarrassed but agreed without knowing what I was doing. She brought me in a room with a couple of other female family members and the bride, Ida. The told me that part of the Bakossi tradition, and many other tribes for that matter, is the 'choosing of the bride' ceremony. The groom is tested by being approached by several women covered from head to toe in fabric and he must choose the correct woman that is his wife. This is what they wanted me to do - cover myself in fabric and walk/dance/sing together with the aunties as we approached the groom to test him. Of course I participated!! As we entered the house and the living room where everyone was gathered, someone spotted my white feet because the sheet/fabric was not long enough... the whole room was bursting with laughter, excitement and surprise! It was hilarious!!! I was told that in some tribes it is very serious, there is no laughter and if the groom chooses the wrong woman he is fined by the brides family. Afterwards, the aunties even gave me 2,000 cfc ($4) as part of the tradition... it was nice...bought my airtime (phone credit) for the next few days!

DJ Delegate and I getting ready to dance Wednesday night!

The men of the families always did this high five hand shake thing the whole weekend. Someone told me that it represented unification of the family and the amount of times that they 'high fived' represented a persons rank. (men of same age = 3, women and young men = 2) They would give three high fives with their right hands and then on the third high five they would grasp hands and then shake their hands as they brought their hands down.
I was warned that we would be dancing until DB (dawn break) but I knew I wouldnt be able to make it that late. I finally called it a night at about 2:30am and the house was still rocking with music. I woke early at about 5:45am and could still hear the music going and people hooting and hollering. I pulled myself out of bed and thought, well, 3 hours is enough sleep - these guys havent even went to bed yet! As I get upstairs I see the house is a mess and people are half a sleep and half dancing and just spread out all over the place.
By 8am those who had went to be (like me) were all awake and the ones who had never slept were still awake as well. The women started preparing the breakfast (tea and bread) while the men just hung out and BSed with each other. I moved back and forth between the men and the women. At about noon or so, everyone slowly started to fall asleep and begin to rest for the day. Thursday, as Delegate had explained earlier, was resting and preparation day. The men slept and the women cooked copious amounts of food for the next day...the court ceremony, church wedding and reception. I helped with whatever I could...washed dishes, peeled carrots, talked to so many family members, politely denied marriage proposals, etc. It remained a pretty low key day for the most part - everyone was just recuperating from the festivities the night before and preparing for what was to come the next day.

On Friday we had the court ceremony at 9am which was really 10:30am. Delegate had to go back to Buea to pick up a niece so thankfully I was in good hands with his family and just went with them. Everyone loved my dress; I had it made especially for the wedding. After court I came back to sleep a bit because I knew I would be up late that night. Delegate made it back in the early afternoon. The church wedding was at 2pm but I went with the second round of family members who arrive closer to 3pm (we didn't miss anything). We were out of the Church by 5:30 and taking tons of photos for at least and hour.

Groom and Bride at the Wedding on Friday.

Beautiful flower girls!

My new family :) I love them so much!

Some of the youngster of the family, they were
calling me "auntie" by the time I was leaving.

By the time we got back to the house, it was just about time to head to the reception. I changed into my 'dancing outfit' and we were on our way. Things started at about 9pm and dancing started veeerrry late, probably after 1am. I danced danced danced until 5am with everyone else!!

Hanging out at the reception, waiting for the dancing to begin!

By the time we got home after dropping everyone off, I wasn't even tired anymore. So I watched the sunrise and chatted with family. All of a sudden I heard large pig squeals coming from the back of the house. I went to watch the Saturday pig slaughter...another part of the wedding tradition. The husband's family gave a pig to the wife's family as part of the bride dowry. It is also like some sort of test - if the family eats it and is sick, then the marriage is not true and it will not work but if the family eats it and it is OK, the marriage will last and it is true love. The pig was huge and it took 5 men to hold him down and kill him. It was really intense but the men insisted that I watch so I can learn all about the traditions :) They then cut up all the parts of the pig and made a list of all the boys in the family (because the big is for the men [although they did share with the women]) and divided up the meat depending on age. Soon I was eating cooked pig skin with pepe (mixture of ground peppers) and holding my own raw chunk of meat to bring home. They really accepted me into the family as one of their own.

The festivities were slowly coming to an end and I started backing up to leave. I found one good cup of coffee and ice cream before I left the city and headed home with other family members who lived in Buea. I made it home before 5pm and tried to catch up on work, but the electricity was out so I just hung out and went to sleep early.

Future Plans
This week I am meeting with the social mobilizers of Bolifamba to set an Identification date for the village and better explain the program so that they can go door to door sensitizing the community about the program. On Friday I will have my 2nd Muea Teen Mother Empowerment workshop and am very much looking forward to it.

I need to find a job in Yaounde because I've made up my mind that that is what I want to do when my contract is done with Social Development International. I am going to Yaounde next weekend (April 27th) to do some networking, apartment hunting and job searching. I was accepted to SIT Graduate Institute for the Intercultural Service, Leadership and Management Masters Program which I would pair with Peace Corps but I will post pone that until fall 2014.

The following weekend, May 4th-5th I will be traveling to Bamenda, Northwest Region to meet/visit a family there. While I was visiting SIT Graduate Institute in February, I met a woman who was going to school there who was from Bamenda - she sent me to Cameroon with a package for her family so I will be bringing things for them and celebrating her younger brothers birthday with them. The Northwest also speaks English and Pidgin and has many historical chiefdoms. I also believe it is the largest exporter of palm wine in the country.